Sunday, September 07, 2014


I longed for the moon,
the droplets of stars mizzled,
my hands are now full.

Teddy's Night - Horror

As always, my insomniac eyes were wide open and my mind was struggling with hundred competing thoughts. I was lying straight on the bed, resting my head over the pillow. My cell displayed 10.30 pm. I had interview exactly after 13 hours, and I was trying to frame answers to some probable questions that interviewer might throw at me. An hour passed by. I was sleepy. I felt the pillow little low. Generally, I keep two folded bed sheets below my pillow to make its height comfortable. However, when a tragedy is about to happen, all your resources to escape are lost first. Last night, I had washed all my bed sheets, and they were enjoying rain, hanging by a wire in the terrace. The uncomforting feeling of low pillow forced me to grab my teddy near the bed, and put it below my head to use it like a pillow. To make the scene clearer, my pillow was at its normal position, the teddy was lying straight over the pillow, its eyes facing the ceiling, and my head was resting over its tummy. After my mind came to rest from all the idiotic imaginations, answer framing and pillow adjustment, I picked up my cell to set the alarm. It displayed 11.43 pm. In the comforting tummy of the teddy, I fell asleep. 

Normally, my sleep breaks at around 3 or 3.30 am, out of thirst. My cell displayed 3.15 am. I was feeling restless. Though it had rained whole day and the weather was cool, I was sweating. I threw away the quilt and stepped down the bed to increase the fan speed. My head felt heavy. Opposite my bed, there is an almirah with a mirror. If you would stand next to my bed, you could see your image. At night, when our room lights are off, the mirror is illuminated by the street light, which peeps in through our window. After turning the regulator twice, I came near my bed and searched for the water bottle. My head and my neck were still in pain. I opened the bottle to pour water into my throat. During this act, my eyes fell upon my image in the mirror and the sip of water got converted into a lump of iron, chocking my throat. The teddy was sitting on my shoulders, its five inched legs crossing around my neck, my head still over its tummy, and its two small hands wrapping my forehead. Its eyes seemed shinier. I observed, my eyes were red, which was completely unusual. I felt the teddy’s hug getting tighter. My throat really chocked and I started coughing. 

In the next moment, I saw my roomies surrounding me, one holding my water bottle, other holding a packet of glucose. The room was lightened. I saw the teddy lying on the floor, close to the bathroom door. My roomie reminded me that I threw the teddy due to a nightmare. But the scene was still fresh to me and I had no clue to distinguish a nightmare from an incidence. Within half an hour, everything cooled down. One of my roomie helped me to lie down again on the bed, and the other roomie placed my belongings at their respective places. Lying on the bed, I could see the teddy next to me, dead as always. I felt relaxed. I convinced myself that it was a nightmare and fell asleep. 

The 5.30 am alarm on my roomie’s cell disturbed my sleep. It was too cold. The teddy was still in its place. I smiled at it, hit its head, pulled the quilt closer to my body and adjusted the pillow. I felt the pillow very soft… if I am sleeping over the tummy of a fat cat……or perhaps, over the tummy of…….! 

Saturday, June 21, 2014

The Collapse

Sobbing in a corner is not enough to heal the wound. Now heart needs to throw itself into the space and scream so loud that the vocal vibrations will completely destroy the spatial peace. A cry so horrendous that its torrent will scrape away the virtual fancies from eyes and brain. The raging thirst to see the reality needs a goblet of acidic brewski to be drunk sip by sip, so acidic that it will burn the lips that shiver by your name.  It will slip through the throat and pour into the belly corroding everything on the way.  Each corner of the heart ruled by you will melt, diffusing all your memories into the cosmos. The venom of truth will spread throughout the body, puncturing every cell, converting it into ashes, so earthly that you could never find its endurance.

Sunday, January 19, 2014

A Juxtapose

I was sitting on one of the two stairs, at the second entrance to our home.  The clock slipped 12 minutes past 11, and the moon was at its perfect grandeur. The streetlight was showing the way to our main gate, and was getting engulfed by the darkness halfway. I was drenched by the moonlight, almost unaware of the beautiful song by Jagjithji on my playlist. Gradually the background music faded. The giggles of night breeze symphonized the ambient, and I was getting goose bumps every time the breeze was crossing by.

The moon was calm among the gossiping stars. I wanted to reach the sky and grab a handful of those little twinkling diamonds.  God is so wise that he kept His priceless beauty away from worldly reach; the dusty auras of greedy mankind may dirt the purity of His creations.

There was a heap of sand in front of me, with a circumference of bricks at its foot. I pressed my palm on the curved surface of the heap, and as soon as I removed my palm, the sand particles slide across each other to retain the original shape of the heap, underestimating the carve formed by my palm on the heap body. I took a handful of sand and tried to mash it. A part of it escaped, a part got trapped. Next, i cupped my palms on the sand, and collected a good amount of it.  I rubbed the sand particles between the palms to feel its granular texture. Is this how those little sparkling diamonds in the sky feel like? Perhaps! Are they really diamonds, embedded in the cloak of God, or merely sand particles, which decorates the torn cloth of a poor man? Are all the creations of God so precious that He has hidden them far beyond the touch of a common man, or made it so nominal that even beggars can afford?